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| Girl in a toxic relationship. |
( 1)The effort is often one sided and you feel like you're always putting more into the relationship than they are doing
( 2)Your partner tried to cut you off from your close friends and family
(3)Trust issues leading to unending ending suspicions
(4)You're left crying most of the time
(5) Important dates are often forgotten
(6)You're being criticized over the silliest things
(7)Even though you all are in a relationship,you still feel lonely with them
Possible Red Flags,Staying And Hoping For A Change Usually Is Short changing
Sometimes we choose impossible individuals so that we can validate just how lovable we are, we believe that if we can make them fall in love with us then we know that we're as desirable as our intuition tells us
You're right -you are as desirable and lovable as you sense that you are,
You don't need a broken individual to just show that you're in a relationship. I always tell people around me that my mental health is my mostpriority ,I will rather lose anyone than lose my peace.
I tried to get my ex to love me for many years. I believed that everything in my life would finally work out if I could only help him do what I know he wanted to do, what he claimed he felt at one point - that was to love me. I could see that I was making a difference in his life - small improvements, tiny indicators that my love was what he needed to love me in return.
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The feminine energy of a conscious woman is highly intoxicating to men. A man in relationship with you will prove this by what he does and says, but the question is - is he giving you an equal share in return, or is he being fed by your energy and avoiding the real work because he’s as full as he desires to be from you, but giving scraps in return?this also apply to a man in a love relationship with a woman, are you getting enough or you're just the only one giving?
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So many of my clients have ocome to me attached to men who don’t have the ability to give the kind of love they deserve. Some are in relationships with married men. Some are in relationships with men who insist on an open relationship to help their partner demonstrate how consciously she has overcome jealousy. Most women have had or are in relationships with men who claim they are committed to growth, but their actions demonstrate the fact that they’re stuck.
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There is no woman magical enough to change or unstick a man. The reason we try to save or change a man is to avoid the introspection and work we actually need to do on ourselves. When we become the most magnificent version of ourselves we don’t settle for men with ‘potential,’ we know our worth and are committed to the ideal of a magnificent man with just as much to give.
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I’m such a pleaser at my core, but through experience and growth I’ve learned to have high standards, maintain my boundaries, say “No” to what doesn’t serve my greatest good and the result has been that I have the kind of relationship with my partner, my family and even my ex where I am treated with the dignity that I deserve.
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The reason we hold on to hope, give up our ideals and lower our expectations is the wounds from our past. We all deserve love and dignity and until we experience it and are held to the high standards we should have for ourselves it’s easy to slip back and allow loneliness, self-doubt or fear to cloud our judgement. Making a permanent change and adopting a commitment to high standards requires support of our own.
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Maybe now is the time to develop a deeper relationship with that family member or friend whose choices and relationships you respect and admire. Maybe there’s a mentor that you had at one point in life that it’s time to reconnect to. Maybe you can find the strength to finally keep the standards that you committed to at one point because you realize what you’re modelling to your children is not the choices that will serve their greatest good.
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We’re not designed to do it alone. Everyone needs someone who sees the greatness in them, who holds space to work through the pain and regret of their past and is willing to be honest about the things in life that need to change to create magnificent relationships. Instead of making a man your priority, why not make yourself your priority?
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Every day I get to observe how this type of commitment radically changes the lives of the clients I work with. Whether it’s letting go of decades of emotional baggage, recreating the relationships with family and children, or raising their standards and manifesting the relationship they desire. I never get used to seeing how dramatically lives change in such a short amount of time.
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If you’d like personal support in your journey or you’d like information about being part of a private group of men and women who are committed to supporting each other in creating a life of high standard, send me a message on email chicrystal90@gmail,com
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Hi CHIOMA, are you saying that people in this kind of relationship but really love their partner cannot be helped to change?
ReplyDeleteBecause I've seen a couple that in each others' company, they find it hard to communicate and agree on simple things but miss each other a lot when they're apart.
Shouldn't they be helped through counseling?
That relationship is not healthy!.,there is no understanding ,there's no mutual communication sense between them, you can't a broken person, what are they missing? their quarrels or arguments ?don't forget that some people thrive on negative energy, these kind of people end up having high blood pressure and cancer ,because their veins and nerves streams of negative energy, they're never relaxed in life.
ReplyDeleteIf people have shown you their true, don't try to repaint them.
You cannot change a broken person, if people have shown you their true colour, don't try to repaint them
ReplyDelete