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Be thankful for your life, spend time in nature, breathe deeply, let go of your worries, forgive yourself and others,and build yourself around what you love.
It could be I still love him, it could be I don't anymore, but when you have strong feelings for someone and they're holding you up, they're not loving you back and they're not allowing you space to express how you feel about them, it hurts so much really.
It may seem easy when you are not the one directly involved,when you're emotionally attached to someone, it's one of the hardest tasks trying to kill it off, especially when they've been together in it with you, then they break up suddenly.
They may have reasons to why they walked away, their reasons may be right in their eyes and they feel justified, but on your side, you had other things cooking, getting set to inject new life into what was somewhat a not-too sparking affair , not out of your carelessness ,it wasn't even because you didn't want them,but just obstruction by the timing.
Look at this scenario,...Fighting hard to pass her final examination in the university Nicole had to put in all her effort in her studies, she had a boyfriend whom she Loved, living in different countries didn't make it easier for both of them, to Nicole she just had to study hard and pass with high grades then return home to her boyfriend who was also growing his personal young company.
With Exams over ,feeling relieved, and excited that finally she'd get to unite with her boyfriend and love him with all her soul and support him in her own little way, she met a block.
Her boyfriend was no longer interested in her and their relationship,he accused Nicole of carelessness and negligence and later insinuated she was cheating.
Nicole was surprised at his allegation, according to her, "this was a masters degree holder who appreciates education and academic excellence "
She tried sorting things out with him but all to no avail. Nicole didn't deny she didn't cheat, but it was more of emotional than sexual "I was lonely and emotionally drained after the sudden and unexpected break up,I needed someone to talk to, my ex was the closest to me,he remained my very good friend after we stopped dating, our past relationship ended due to disagreement between our families something that had to do with tribe, it didn't make us enemies, we knew too well how to respect boundaries, after some times my boyfriend felt like its okay if we talk from time to time, an idea that wasn't bad to me,in one of our conversations he asked about my intimate life and I told him about my closeness with my ex, note I made it clear there was no physical intimacy, so I was surprised when he added this to the list of the reasons he broke up with me."
He said "how can I expect him to take me back after I've cheated on him?
The whole thing didn't measure up to me, I felt he didn't really feel safe and confident in what we had, I know I had lots of plans for us, him and I, being someone on the same level of IQ with myself I hoped for the best,everything may not work out the way we planned but I'm not waiting for closure, I feel emptiness most times when I breathe and find none of my hope and the fantasies I built around him not becoming a reality, I've come to understand that you don't always get closure ,I just told myself to move on believing that there's a better life for me out there.
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